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Weekly topics covering life‘s challenges with a positive spin and a new perspective. It‘s time to connect, learn, and grow!
Episodes
Tuesday Nov 16, 2021
Tuesday Nov 16, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...we will be exposing the elephant in the room, exploring the why behind defiance or hurt feelings, and embracing a new perspective with hopefully understanding and tolerance. We’re aimed at addressing the power imbalance instead of avoiding it. Of course, we will come at the subject from many angles. The abuse of legitimate power and the misuse of perceived power. It may be helpful to use a personal and professional lens to understand what it means to push back and find your voice and when it’s appropriate. We should also be mindful of our own power and suitable use and squander. The word mindful may be the buzzword of the decade but it really is the key to understanding. Mindfulness: a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations. It’s about being aware from all angles taking into account all involved.
When one hears the word bullying or to bully the first thought, at least for me, is the big boy on the playground picking on the smaller boy. It dawned on me even though that was my first thought, it in no way represents all the facets of the subject and in fact, is a much too narrow view. So I looked up the definition: seek to harm, intimidate, or coerce (someone perceived as vulnerable). With my first impression of bullying I can say, I don’t have any first-hand knowledge. As a child I was always, for the most part, self-confident and extroverted. I might have been viewed as a leader instead of a follower. I can’t recall a time where someone picked on me at least to the point that it did harm or that I carried the memory with me.
But, when I consider the actual definition: seek to harm, intimidate, or coerce (someone perceived as vulnerable). I can think of many times that I have been or have been attempted to be coerced. In an attempt to seek harm? I’m not sure, intentional or not, it could be viewed as harmful. Perceived as vulnerable? Anytime someone is uninformed they are vulnerable so if you want to split hairs, and I think we should for this purpose then yes. With this new perspective on the definition, I can safely say, we’ve all been involved in a power imbalance at one time or another.
Now, I’m not going to bash the news and social media (even if mentioned) or go on a political tangent. Coercion is all around us. My goal is to shed some light and new perspectives that we can take on our journey of self-discovery. Knowledge is power! I think we can all start there.
KEY HIGHLIGHTS - The Power Imbalance, Addressing vs Avoiding
- Anytime someone is uninformed they are vulnerable
- Coercion is forcing someone to do something by making threats. It’s an attempt to control a person’s behavior with force or manipulation.
- Malicious put-downs, name-calling, and frequent criticisms are all forms of bullying behavior.
- Coercive control is a pernicious form of domestic abuse that entraps you in a hostage-like situation
- If you are in a coercive situation, whether professionally or personally, it is important to seek support.
- “Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity… Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble.”
- The greatest mistake we can make is believing our words have no value in other people’s lives.
- Words filter through us and seep into our community, where they are absorbed then reasserted by others to people they know.
- Meeting people where they are and helping them with the burdens they carry today seems a more lucrative act of kindness and compassion.
- What you speak over your life is what your life will become.
CHALLENGE: find your voice and speak life and love into others as well as over your own life. The power imbalance shifts when you expose the discrepancies while gaining knowledge about your own thoughts and opinions.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Nov 09, 2021
Tuesday Nov 09, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show… we are letting go of the rope, lowering our voices, and raising our chins because we’re determined to keep the power and drop the struggle. What are we fighting for anyway? Have you ever stopped to ask yourself that? What are you holding on to so fiercely that you can’t even fathom that there might be another side, a different perspective, or a better answer? We aren’t talking about life’s ups and downs that can cause the endless rollercoaster of adulting. We are talking about the struggles that we create. Let’s explore them from all angles to see if we can find some wiggle room. Here, we will need to climb up high for a different vantage point because on the ground slugging it out, we only see what’s right in front of us or what we want to see.
I sometimes think, what’s all the fuss about? Standing back and taking it all in, it seems like everyone is mad about something. Tension is high all around us. I’ve heard, “if you don’t stand for something, you stand for nothing.” Bold statements like that have me thinking...oh no, what do I stand for?? I mean, I don’t want to stand for, nothing! Quick….what do I stand for?
Well, guess what, I have a lot of thoughts, opinions, and ideas. What I don’t have is the need to share them all the time with everyone. And even though I have the gift of gab, I don’t feel compelled to be to loudest one in the room or the last one talking.
Now, maybe that’s just me and you might feel otherwise. Maybe you have a passion burning within you and a push to get everyone to see it, believe it, and buy into it. But even though we aren’t on the same page or see everything eye-to-eye, does that make one of us wrong? What if we were both right even though we approach life totally differently. Is there room in your world for me to be right too? Does my being right, necessarily make you wrong?
Perceptions are in the eye of the beholder as are points of view. It’s what’s make us uniquely different. It also helps push us to learn, flex, adapt, and grow.
Mel Schwartz L.C.S.W.. helps us with: A Shift of Mind
KEY HIGHLIGHTS - Keep the Power, Drop the Struggle
- Perceptions are in the eye of the beholder as are points of view. It’s what’s make us uniquely different. It also helps push us to learn, flex, adapt, and grow.
- Perspective-taking is seeing things from various viewpoints. Perspective-seeking is basically looking at things objectively rather than picking a side.
- When we have a broad mind and attempt to understand both sides of the coin, we grow.
- There will always be two sides to every story. So take both in and try to understand objectively.
- One of the most prevalent—and damaging—themes in our culture is the need to be right.
- Being quick to defend or preach a different point of view means you aren’t making space for opposing opinions.
- Acknowledgment and acceptance of a differing worldview is a powerful act of understanding, self-confidence, and compassion.
- You are a unique miracle of existence. You will make mistakes and succeed, help and hurt others, be right and be wrong. But you are still OK
- Mentally strong people make self-improvement a priority, because they know there's always room for improvement.
- If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
CHALLENGE: to drop the rope, listen with an ear for understanding, walk away when negativity threatens your inner peace. Pull out of the power struggle and let go of the need to be right. Change starts with you!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Nov 02, 2021
Tuesday Nov 02, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show… We are checking it twice, looking to the horizon, and consulting a trusted advisor as we discuss; a clock, a compass, and a companion. This show is not to scare you with reminders like, “you’re running out of time” or “look at you, you’re still in the same spot” or even to provide a disclaimer like, “ you can’t go it alone”. Instead, it’s to remind you how precious time is, and how important it could be to identify what you want so you know where you need to go. And to encourage you to look to or strengthen your inner circle to provide love, support, and inspiration along your journey. We all desire to go somewhere emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Do you think that might require some mindful preparation?
I attended a leadership conference the other day and came away so inspired. So I would say, they nailed it. Regardless of the business, you're in, I think we can all appreciate a day of encouraging talks as we are reminded about the bigger picture and mission in life. It’s easy to get sucked into the day-to-day and lose sight of what’s important. We have meetings, emails, deadlines, and endless to-do’s. Even if you aren’t running the rat race anymore you can get preoccupied with the problems of the world with its perceived timelines and schedules.
How much time do you spend in silence, pondering life, and preparing for what’s next? That’s right ….silence. Not reading, watching, or listening to anything. Not surfing, or clicking, or posting anywhere. Just thinking. Not reminiscing, rehashing, or ruminating. Just thinking.
Time and space are so important to learn who, why, and what you need.
An Ode to Silence: Why You Need It in Your Life
And how to find more of it found at health.clevelandclinic.org
The Clock: The clock is always ticking in this life. Time passes, and we either take advantage of opportunities, or we miss them. So it’s important to keep the clock in mind. But it’s not the only thing if you want to live a life of significance.
The Compass: The compass is what we steer life by. It remains constant, and we’re wise when we align ourselves with the direction we know we should be going. But just lining up with the compass doesn’t get us anywhere if we don’t start moving.
Here are: 7 Tips to Help You Embark on a Journey of Self Discovery found at Bodhiheart.com
Nick Wignall leaves us with 4 Psychological Habits of Highly Self-Aware People found at medium.com
KEY HIGHLIGHTS: A Clock, A Compass, and A Companion
- Time and space are so important to learn who, why, and what you need.
- “We can use calm, quiet moments to tap into a different part of the nervous system that helps shut down our bodies’ physical response to stress.”
- Together the clock and the compass provide us with both motivation and direction. Finding a balance between them means that we’re able to compound our efforts and add the most value that we can to our world.
- A leader's potential is determined by those closest to him.
- Learning to find our own closure, and focus our energies on the positive people in our lives is one of the healthiest choices we can make for ourselves.
- The journey to self-discovery, which starts with a willingness to embrace new ideas while letting go of past beliefs and being eager to get to know yourself in a new light
- “Who am I?” The desire to answer this question is one of the most powerful motivations for contemplative practice.
- Self-awareness isn’t something you’re born into. It’s something you build through practice.
- Challenge whether the questions, motivations, and methods are good enough, not whether you are good enough.
- True self-awareness comes from genuine interaction with other people
CHALLENGE: to pack light for your journey as you will pick up plenty of tools along your way. Maximize your time as you shoot for your goals allowing those who care, support your efforts. Build the necessary network by investing your time and energy into others.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Oct 26, 2021
Tuesday Oct 26, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...we aren’t trying to get hip, don’t trip, throw shade, or be woke - we are simply trying to bridge the generational gap and understand all the ages. Do you feel like you’re stuck in a time warp not understanding what the “kids” today are saying, meaning, or even thinking? Maybe you’re on the other end with mind-blowing comments like we used to walk everywhere we went or gas used to cost 25 cents a gallon. Better yet you’re trapped in the middle being the interpreter of multiple generations wondering where you fit it. Understanding is key to getting you out of the rut and over the hump but where do you start? You start by not limiting your understanding to what is comfortable and makes perfect sense to you. You stretch your mind by being open and willing to explore other ideas.
No matter what generation you’re in, there is space to grow and learn. We kid about being stuck in a time warp but think about it, what if you really were? Pick an era you felt had it all. Quality of life, values, morals and easier way to go - whatever you feel gave it the advantage. Now, transport that person HERE, to this place and time. Imagine what it would feel like to be lost trying to navigate the modern conveniences of today. Technology, transportation, communication, you name it.
I have always been one to embrace new technology. Not an early adopter per se but my jobs have always made it necessary to be tech-savvy AND I’m naturally curious and not afraid of messing something up. Because of that, I’ve kept up pretty well. To give you some context, I believe computers were introduced during my senior year in high school and my first experience with the internet was data by the hour. I was before email or cell phones.
When cell phones were available they were car phones and I wasn’t about to get a car phone until I had a nice car to put it in which meant it was much later when I actually got my first phone. When text messaging became available I thought it was the silliest thing - kind of like when you could write shell or hello on a calculator.
Can you think of a gap you’ve had or witnessed? How have you been able to find a bridge?
Interactiveschools.com enlightens us with: GENERATION WHO? UNDERSTANDING THE TRENDS OF EACH GEN
Susan Adcox informs us with What Research Says About the Generation Gap
Generational Differences and Their Causes found at verywellfamily.com
The Edu4Sure Team gives us 7 Ways To Bridge The Generation Gap found at edu4sure.com
KEY HIGHLIGHTS: Bridging the Generational Gap An Understanding for All Ages
- Be willing to stretch your mind by being open and willing to explore other ideas
- It’s easy to pick judgment over understanding and acceptance.
- Everything that we experience is filtered, categorized, and dealt with in some automatic way
- Sometimes, these judgments are helpful. They can lead you to understand the things that bring you up, give you energy, and fill you with purpose.
- Mindfulness presents an alternative to this vicious cycle in the form of non-judgment.
- Setting down the judging mind, even for a short while, is a refreshing weight off of your shoulders.
- To practice mindfulness is to make direct contact with the experience you’re having. Getting in touch with the actual experience itself is a freeing and peaceful state.
- Today, although more Americans see generational differences, most do not see them as divisive.
- According to the Pew study, all generations regard older Americans as superior in moral values, work ethic, and respect for others.
- Connect, listen, understand, and encourage
CHALLENGE: to work together. Most conflict comes from a lack of understanding and why don’t we understand? Because we aren’t open to other ideas that conflict with our own and we aren’t listening. Today, be patient and look for more commonalities vs differences.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Oct 19, 2021
Tuesday Oct 19, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show... we are breaking free, removing the stronghold of stress, and finding relief. “How?” you say. “Cut to the chase!” you say. Well now, you know me better than that. I’m on this journey too. I might seem cool as a cucumber but I have my fair share of stress. Mostly self-inflicted but stress all the same. I don’t have to tell you that prolonged stress can have serious effects on your health and on your life. So outside of quitting your demanding job, putting your kids into boarding school, and giving all pets to the Sunnyside Farm over yonder somewhere - let’s explore the cause of your stress, what it may or may not be doing to you, and ways you can get some relief.
Let’s start with understanding a little more about stress. You might be overwhelmed, frustrated, tired, or cranky - but are you stressed?
Do you feel anxious when you can’t find something, get somewhere, or meet someone? Are you putting yourself into this predicament? Saying yes and not saying no?
It’s important on this journey not to lump it all together as just a stressful day. What about the day was stressful? Did you wake up that way or was there an event that triggered this feeling?
Dr. Elizabeth Scott helps us get started with her article for verywellmind.com: What Is Stress?
KEY HIGHLIGHTS: The Stranglehold of Stress And How to Find Relief
- My Grandpa told me if you don’t want to be late, leave a little early
- The way you respond to stress makes a big difference to your overall well-being
- Sometimes stress can come from an obvious source, but sometimes even small daily stresses from work, school, family, and friends can take a toll on your mind and body
- In cases of chronic stress, the relaxation response doesn't occur often enough, and being in a near-constant state of fight-or-flight can cause damage to the body.
- When you understand the toll stress takes on you and the steps to combat stress, you can take charge of your health and reduce the impact stress has on your life.
- Discover how to live more mindfully throughout your day so you can become more awake and conscious throughout your life
- You can NOT do everything and trying will eventually catch up with you.
- It's scary but true: there are plenty of silent signs stress is making you sick, or just messing with your well-being in ways you aren't fully aware of.
- Stress can have many detrimental impacts on your relationship, and they're often subtle, so you might not even realize that they're happening.
- You have to be willing to say no and let some of those things weighing down your schedule, adding unnecessary pressure, and stealing your joy.
CHALLENGE: build in time to decompress and find joy. Be willing to let go of the need to do it all, break the stranglehold of stress, and experience relief. The long-term payoff is worth it!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Oct 12, 2021
Tuesday Oct 12, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...we aren’t pretending to have all the answers or even the navigation tools to move on or get going in the right direction. We’re just trying to make sense of loss and move forward. Coping is an individual skill that everyone has to come to in their own time. You might crave comfort and support from family and friends and then again, you may want to retreat into your own cocoon until you are ready to face tomorrow. Loss also can describe a multitude of deprivation. You might be faced with a tragedy of biblical proportions or slowly losing something you cherish. We can grieve life-changing events as well as missed opportunities. All come with their own challenges and adjustment periods and neither should we judge ourselves harshly nor push ourselves to move too fast through the process. It’s important to encourage and nurture yourself as well as your friends and loved ones. Gentle reminder; we are all unique individuals and what you find sad, fun, outrageous, brilliant, or mad - may be slightly or radically different from others.
Encouragementology is about all of life’s challenges and loss is a big one. We all will and have dealt with grief at some point in our lives.
"The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief - But the pain of grief is only a shadow when compared with the pain of never risking love." Hillary Stanton Zunin
You only experience profound grief when you’ve experienced great love. Some say it’s the trade-off.
But that doesn’t really help one get through it. We can all agree: Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. - Alfred Lord Tennyson
As I said, we will be looking at all types of loss from different angles. But let’s start with the most shattering as an attempt to cover the heartbreaking first and work our way into the light. The loss of a loved one.
I found some thoughts for exploration at healgrief.org: Understanding Grief and Loss: An Overview
It will never get easy no matter how many books you read or podcasts you listen to. Losing someone you love is the hardest kind of loss which is why we covered it first. Unlike the stages of grief….we can move on in the show, just like that. SNAP
What about losing a relationship, albeit love, friendship, or colleague? This has its own set of challenges. You lose someone but they didn’t really go anywhere, just out of YOUR life.
Whether you were on the giving or receiving end - breaking up is hard to do. I’ve had my share of loss during my lifetime and the hardest part to me is the “what ifs” or the “what did I do’s”. You can go on an endless pursuit for something that will make sense and give answers where there are only questions. But is any of that real? It’s easier for us to fabricate that moment in time that the disillusionment happened than to accept that it’s just time to move on or that everyone isn’t supposed to be in your life forever but instead, come and go.
Surviving A Relationship Break-Up - Top 20 Strategies from Dr. Kim Maertz At the Mental Health Centre, University of Alberta
Amy Morin helps us with Healthy Coping Skills for Uncomfortable Emotions found at verywellmind.com
KEY HIGHLIGHTS: Making Sense of Loss and Moving Forward
- Gentle reminder; we are all unique individuals and what you find sad, fun, outrageous, brilliant, or mad - may be slightly or radically different from others.
- You only experience profound grief when you’ve experienced great love.
- There are no rules, no timetables, and no linear progression to overcoming grief
- Your feelings are normal, and it’s important to remember that at some point, it will get better.
- treat yourself with kindness, compassion, and without judgment. You have the right to grieve, and no one — including yourself — can tell you when it’s time to end that process.
- Your mind and body are connected, and physical health helps with the emotional healing process.
- If left untreated, both complicated grief and depression can lead to significant health problems, emotional damage, and more.
- Healthy coping means both identifying these feelings and allowing ourselves to experience these feelings.
- As we talk to supportive friends and family members, we can come to some new understandings and relieve some of our pain. Holding all of these negative feelings in just doesn’t work
- When you’re feeling distressed, ask yourself, “Do I need to change my situation or do I need to find a way to better cope with the situation?”
CHALLENGE: be kind and gentle with yourself, lean in to support from friends and family, search for coping strategies that aid support without feeling rushed. Loss and the grief associated with it have no timeline but offer hope that it will get better.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Oct 05, 2021
Tuesday Oct 05, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...we aren’t giving up but staying in there; focused and moving forward as we master the art of being politely persistent instead of pushy. Now that may come easy to you...OR you might be conjuring up a memory of being walked over, easily discounted, bossy, and demanding. Whichever seems like more your speed, finding a delicate balance can be difficult. Not to fear, we are going to walk through these behaviors to trying on what works best for you. The important part to remember is that you are in control of your own actions and reactions and that being your best and giving your all, is up to you. So many times we’re easily detoured at the first sign of resistance or we barrel through unannounced and unaware making sure the outcome is in our favor.
I’ve been in sales my whole adult life but even before I acquired those skills, I was born with a few of my own. The gift of gab, natural-born negotiation, and not easily accepting the word no. Yes, that one got me in trouble more than once. One of the things you learn as a salesperson is that “no” just means not now or that you might need to finesse your value proposition to better match the client’s needs, but that’s for another show. You also learn that being pushy or aggressive will get you shut down and shut out which is not a good place to be when you rely on a prospective client’s purchases today and in the future.
So it’s imperative that you find a balance, persistent but not pushy. I had a client tell me that about myself one time. I think I apologized for continuing to push him and he said “you are politely persistent, not pushy”. What a relief and it’s something that has stuck with me since.
Here’s an example of his technique found at changingminds.org
Z.Hereford explains The Power of Persistence found at essentiallifeskills.net
KEY HIGHLIGHTS -
- We “sell” in everything we do. We sell people on our ideas, we negotiate terms, we follow up, and we close deals.
- Developing networking and strong interpersonal skills early helps you get ahead in every area of life.
- By listening more than you talk, you learn how to ask the right questions at the right time.
- Only you can move you, forward.
- One of the ways you can prepare for setbacks and obstacles is to anticipate potential problems and have a contingency plan.
- When we are overwhelmed with a problem or difficulty, we don't have time to develop the persistence necessary to deal with a particular obstacle or setback.
- Despite any old adage you may have heard and believed, you can always learn something new.
- It can be tough to tell the difference between true assertiveness and habits that come off as too pushy, since they can both deal with getting what you want, telling people what you think, and having things go your way.
- When people are being assertive [...] they are expressing their needs in direct, open, honest ways while still being respectful of the other person's needs and preferences
- You have to put yourself out there again and again. The best way to improve is to fail. You'll learn from your mistakes and become better
CHALLENGE: be willing to commit to self-discovery as you become more aware of what you think, how you react, and how it’s perceived. Be diligent in your pursuit making polite persistence the goal instead of pushy.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 28, 2021
Tuesday Sep 28, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...we are walking a fine line and exploring a delicate balance as we find our voices while embracing our silence. Choices... aren’t you glad you have choices? Now if we could just figure out the right cadence, the appropriate timing, and the relevance of it all. You might have heard, "if you want something you have to speak up and demand it" but then you may have also heard, "you get more bees with honey". No matter which way you turn, you can find a quote validating your decision.
"Where you see wrong or inequality or injustice, speak out, because this is your country. This is your democracy. Make it. Protect it. Pass it on." -Thurgood Marshall.
“Before you speak ask yourself if what you are going to say is true, is kind, is necessary, is helpful. If the answer is no, maybe what you are about to say should be left unsaid”. - Bernard Meltzer
“Silence is a source of great strength”. Lao Tzu
When you consider whether to speak up or to remain silent or somewhere in between, you have to consider a few factors:
Timing - is this the appropriate time for you to insert your opinion or defend your idea?
Relevancy - is what you’re saying relevant to the conversation, climate, or the hour?
Origin - where did this idea originate? From a place of kindness or retaliation?
Outcome - what are you hoping to gain with your input? To prove a point, further the conversation, share knowledge, or lobby acceptance.
That might sound insane to have to go through that filtering system before you speak but let’s sit back and think about it for a minute. We have all been guilty of speaking before thinking. Letting our emotions or thirst for justification, get the better of us or walked away from a conversation wishing we would have kept our mouth shut.
Building in a moment to pause….and think, could make all the difference.
Brittany Johnson shares 7 Things To Remember When You're Scared To Speak Up
Greg Savva sheds some light on the feel of Powerlessness found at couseling-direcory.org
Over at emindful.com, I found Three Ways to Help You Speak Up and Convey Your Thoughts
KEY HIGHLIGHTS: Finding Your Voice And Embracing Your Silence
- When you find your voice, you don’t find some new thing inside of you; instead, you find a little more of you.
- “Finding your voice” is a misleading name for this process. The real work is wondering why you don’t like what you already have to say.
- One thing I’m learning is to let everyone establish their own level of comfort. It’s not up to me to make people comfortable.
- Most social conflicts between good people start with bad communication or no communication.
- The right words can be incredibly healing.
- You are as powerful as the meaningful ideas you share with others, and you are as wise as the selective silence you leave behind.
- Without fully knowing how your words will be received and what kind of effect they might have - should you be so free with them?
- Sometimes finding the will to voice our opinion is challenging because we’re worried it isn’t in the majority
- Taking time to connect to our values also can motivate us to share our opinion – even when they might not be popular.
- When it comes to expressing our needs, sometimes timing is as important as knowing what to say.
CHALLENGE: take a moment to assess and decide what is best for you and the situation. Your words are powerful and when used appropriately they can inspire, soothe, and encourage. Filter negativity and speak up with authority or stay silent with intention.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 21, 2021
Tuesday Sep 21, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show...it’s all in the eye of the beholder. From your line of vision, are you on the ground staring at what can only be described as an unsurmountable mess of chaos, stress, and todos OR are you feeling the fresh air of victory as you look down and survey all you’ve accomplished and what might be your next move? Transportation from one visual to the next is within your power and your perspective. You might have heard it before “the day starts and ends with you”. This mantra isn’t announcing your logistical whereabouts but instead describing your power over perception. The start and particularly your positive or negative acceptance are up to you. And at the end of the day, it’s YOU who describes the sentiment of the day. Was it a good day or a bad day….only you know. You have the power to move mountains with what you expect, what you project, and what you accept.
I have been talking about Encouragementology - the practice of instilling hope, for over 5 years. It started with the revelation of encouragement and how that affects all creatures. Investing one’s time, empathy, and positive energy can have a profound impact on the universe. Encouragement shouldn’t be watered down to a “go gettum” mantra or a slogan like “just do it”. It’s important to understand what appropriate encouragement looks like and the power one produces when delivering authentic encouragement.
I produced a couple of talks recently and it dawned on me; an overarching theme for everything I’ve ever talked about is Power & Perspective. I’m on a mission to help people understand the power they possess to rule over their lives. The golden combination includes one’s perspective. With just a slight shift in perspective, your mental location can go from base camp to scaling the summit. And back….and back again.
Stacy Weibe gives us WAYS TO ENCOURAGE OTHERS found at thelife.com
KEY HIGHLIGHTS -Moving Mountains, Power & Perspective
- You have the power to move mountains with what you expect, what you project, and what you accept.
- Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words can change your brain.
- A positive view of yourself will bias you toward seeing the good in others, whereas a negative self-image will include you toward suspicion and doubt.
- It doesn’t have to be a premeditated act of kindness to be encouraging.
- The sheer fact that you have a choice is another way to demonstrate your power.
- since life’s events aren’t imbued with universal meaning, you get to choose how you feel about things. You are in control of your life’s narrative!
- your energy is not dictated by the randomness of life’s happening
- When you understand that life’s events don’t carry universal meaning, your enthusiasm and energy are not held captive by the randomness of life’s events.
- Investing time in another human being can pay the most rewarding dividends.
- You have resources around you, a mouth to ask for help, a mind that can deliver patience, and the ability to soothe your stress. You are not powerless.
CHALLENGE: Recognize your power to choose perception, affect change, ignite positivity, and spread encouragement. Going from base camp to summit is all within your reach.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 14, 2021
Tuesday Sep 14, 2021
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we’re keeping both eyes wide open as we hit FEAR head-on. That’s right, we are standing up to fear, pushing it back, and delivering an ultimatum; show you’re worth in our lives or get to packin’. No longer will we let the stronghold of fear hold us back from who we were meant to be, what we were meant to do, and where we were meant to go. Fear has a middle name; acceptance and that one has to go to. We aren’t accepting that because this is the way it’s always been, this is the way it will always be. Hogwash! I don’t know about you but I deserve more and won’t settle for settling. Even if we can’t snap our finger and dissolve fear into dust we CAN make a commitment, right now, to each other that we will take a step forward to finding the why, the what, and the how.
Many types of fear are natural. It’s what causes our body to react and take action so a healthy dose is positive and crucial to survival. We’ll be digging into the mechanics of that as we go along. There is also a decent amount of irrational fears. Like fear of spiders, Junebugs, or balloons. These fears creep up on you and no matter what you tell yourself…” Kendall, it’s a balloon, a child’s party favor, how on earth can that hurt you?” your body still reacts on its own assumptions.
But the fear we are going to dive into is the persistent fear that cripples you from achieving your true potential or even a normal life. The one that smothers you in self-doubt, anxiety, and shame. That feeling who’s unwelcomed visits come at the worst possible times.
Have you ever heard of the “power of suggestion?” Maybe you’ve heard, “what you seek you shall find?” Fear can be easily handed to us as an ember and with a little fuel, we can have a full-on fire that is out of control. The media is notorious for sending out spark after spark. But in the power of suggestion is also your power of perception. You can reject these notions and do your own discovery. You can push back, unplug, and step away. Shock and awe have always sold better than oohs and awwwes.
So, what are you afraid of? If you’ve literally been afraid to find out, you might not yet know. Oh, you get that panicky feeling that comes out of nowhere but instead of trying to identify the root cause you’ve been focusing on your reaction to it. Sounds reasonable. But no one gets anywhere without taking a step forward.
Leo Babauta outlines A Guide to Beating the Fears That Are Holding You Back found on zenhabits.com
KEY HIGHLIGHTS - FEAR FOR EVERY AND ANY REASON
- When we are able to recognize what is and isn’t a real threat, relabel an experience and enjoy the thrill of that moment, we are ultimately at a place where we feel in control.
- Abnormal levels of fear and anxiety can lead to significant distress and dysfunction and limit a person’s ability for success and joy of life.
- Fear sees only the downside
- Give yourself time and space to hear other voices besides fear’s in any decision.
- In the power of suggestion is also your power of perception
- Remember that you have the power to turn off the remote, leave a website, or change the radio station.
- First, acknowledge your fear. This is a huge first step.
- Take control over it by writing it down. It is now outside you.
- Recognize that you’re not alone, that we ALL have these fears, that we all think we might not be good enough.
- Be in the moment. Fear of failure (and other similar fears) are fears of the future
CHALLENGE: to control your fears by understanding them. There is power in knowledge and your own perception. When armed, fight back to remove their stronghold. Freedom from fear holds your victory.
I Know YOU Can Do It!