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Weekly topics covering life‘s challenges with a positive spin and a new perspective. It‘s time to connect, learn, and grow!
Episodes
Tuesday Oct 04, 2022
Tuesday Oct 04, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
Sometimes walking away and letting go can be the hardest thing to do. Letting go of people, ideas, regrets, routines, or desires. Hard work, focus, and even love may not be enough to control a situation and dictate the outcome. Sometimes you simply have to let go and realize it’s not your fight, it’s not your journey, and it’s not your life. But there is a way to do this...and that’s with Love.
Here’s a secret that I’m hoping is a revelation for you sooner rather than later. You can not change people. Waiting for someone to meet your expectations may be the cruelest irony. They will NEVER meet your expectations because it’s not theirs. Your hope should be they meet or exceed their own true potential. But your expectations are just that….your expectations.
- Last show was about managing our own expectations
- Who do you have expectations for?
- Are they realistic?
- Are they about you or about them?
- How many chances do you give?
- What does it take for you to let go?
Blog - Joyful Days - live well, be happy https://www.joyfuldays.com/let-go-of-expectations/
Shreya Dalela shares info on Practicing The Subtle Art Of Detachment found on her blog
CHALLENGE: Be aware of the power struggle in your own life and who’s pulling harder. Question your resistance and remember, you are worth more. Your time, your attention, your patience, and your love are worth more. Split the difference with yourself.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 27, 2022
Tuesday Sep 27, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are elevating our thinking and rising above for a new perspective. Life can be chaotic and the world may seem out of control but WE don’t have to get lost in the minutia trying to figure it all out. Are you shaking your head because you’ve had one of those days? I’m sure when you woke up this morning you had high hopes to soar through the day focused on only the positive only to get pushed and pulled into every traumatic, anxiety-induced, over-the-top issue possible. Ok breathe….stay with me here, what if, none of that needed your time and attention? I’m not suggesting and out of body experience here but let’s imagine ourselves floating up above all the problems of the world. From here we look down to put things into perspective. What do you see?
I love this visual and use it often. It reduces a mountain back down to a molehill. It allows me to prioritize when everything seems to want the same amount of attention, and it opens my eyes to the fact that I don’t have to spin every plate or catch every ball.
Everyone can picture a mouse maze, right? Now, don’t you know the mouse wishes he had your perspective right now? All he wants is some cheese, he’s hungry, he can smell it but from his vantage point, he only sees obstacle after obstacle, dead end after dead end. From your perspective, you can see the right path to the cheese without any problem - “Go there…no no, take a left, now a right, RUN You got it!”
The chaos of life can feel like that mouse maze where we keep going in circles and getting now where. What if we change our vantage point?
Jacqueline T. Hill shows us How to Develop Different Perspectives on Life found at lifehack.org
Preston Smiles - Change Your Perception Change Your Life
CHALLENGE: Stop running the rat race and rise above. Change your vantage point for a new perspective. You don’t have to participate in the same manner or at all. Search out a new route for your journey.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 20, 2022
Tuesday Sep 20, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are flipping on our internal filters and giving ourselves ample time and space to consider our words and consider them wisely because our words matter! You’ve heard it before, there is life and death in your words. Research shows the average person speaks at least 7,000 words a day, with many speaking much more than that. The words you speak are your imprint on the world and dictate how people perceive you – and largely define you. What are you saying? How many of those 7,000 words you spoke were encouraging? How many included gossip or judgment? How many were the same words you spoke yesterday? How many involved a smile and how many were said through tears?
Your words matter. The words you say to yourself, out of your mouth, or in your head. The words you use to describe yourself to the people who love you and the ones you’ve just met. The words you use to fill a gap in your day or the ones you go out of your way to say. The words that shine a light on the good and the ones that reinforce the bad.
When is the last time you thought about your words? When is the last time you questioned, contradicted, or fought back against the words you heard when you were growing up that define you today? When is the last time you searched for new words to replace the old ones?
At Health Direct I found some important information about Self Talk.
Over at carolcooke.com I found 5 Reasons for Pushing Beyond Your Limits.
CHALLENGE: Take the time to consider your words, where are your 7,000 going? When you notice a negative turn either internally, in a mixed company, or directed toward someone else, remember that only you can course correct and get back on track.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 13, 2022
Tuesday Sep 13, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are armed with a hoe and spade in hand as we attempt to pluck out our deeply rooted compulsive behavior of people pleasing. Now, before you question how bad could “pleasing” someone really be? I will just say stop, listen, and hold on to your hat! This episode is meant to be eye-opening to help you notice these characteristics in yourself and in others as a way to bring awareness and the opportunity for change.
I for one held out on addressing these issues longer than I should. Frankly, I was in denial. A notable characteristic in itself. I’m “helping people” hello, doesn’t anyone but me recognize this? For some reason, I just had the capacity to be able to take on more and solve everyone else’s problems while solving my own. Sounds reasonable right? Well if you just said yes then you are in as bad of shape as I was so stay tuned.
I didn’t know what people were referring to when they would say things like, take care of yourself first before you can take care of others. If I would have taken the time to do that, then they would have been in even more of a mess than they were to start with. Geez - looking back now I can see how ridiculous that line of thinking was but then, under that influence, without the awareness, it sounded perfectly normal. Thank you to CODA - Codependence Anonymous for opening my eyes.
JACK CANFIELD | The Law Of Attraction CHEAT CODE!
CHALLENGE: take an honest look at yourself and be willing to address your characteristics that aren’t serving you in a loving and positive way. You have the power to change your thinking and your behavior.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Sep 06, 2022
Tuesday Sep 06, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are pressing pause on our heat-seeking mission and adopting a new approach - what we seek lies within. Who knew? The books we’ve read, the miles we’ve traveled, the mantras we’ve memorized, and all this time it was closer than our backyard. Our power and peace are actually within us and they’ve been here the whole time! No sense blaming the snake that could’ve bit you. Be thankful that you are learning it now with plenty of time to activate them and use them going forward. So many times we are in search of someone to save us, entertain us, inspire us, motivate us, push us, or pull us. We can’t seem to get going because we haven't met the right person, read the right book, or heard the right podcast. So we wait, grumble, whine, ruminate, and even get angry. All the while the spigot within us remains untapped. Who couldn’t use a little more power and peace? Wait…I said who couldn’t, put those hands down.
Oh boy, if you’re looking for power all you have to do is Google it. Seriously, power, finding your power, being powerful, activating your power, and tapping into your power are all the craze these days. Why do you think that is? I’m assuming it’s because a lot of people are feeling pretty powerless these days and are grasping at anything and everything to feel even the least bit empowered.
So it’s within us? We’ve had this power all along? You mean I can stop what I’m doing and tap into my power at any moment? Yep. Let’s learn a little more and don’t forget peace. At the end of the day, it’s the only thing that carries us through until tomorrow. Peace and of course Hope.
Chiara Gizzi shares 3 SIMPLE STEPS TO ACCESS THE POWER WITHIN YOU found at iamfearlessoul.com
Ready for a Daily Power Practice? Carley Hauck gives us 10 Steps to Finding Inner Strength
Amber Murphy at declutterthemind.com helps us with 15 Ways to Achieve Inner Peace
CHALLENGE: Look within to tap into your power and your peace. Build in daily practice so that activating your gifts becomes second nature. Remember to intentionally share these gifts with those you meet to heighten the experience.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are stepping up and taking notice of the needs around us and in ourselves. Feeling frustrated and small when it comes to the problems all around you? You are not alone. No matter how big the problem is or seems, you can make a powerful impact, today, right this second. All you have to do is notice and take action. You might be asking “what can I do?” that’s right but this time say it with conviction; “What CAN I do?” and then be willing to pitch in. Just like challenges can seem huge solutions can be small. Your efforts can help one person immensely or inspire more to help many. Either way, your actions have an impact.
I used to have that same mindset. The world’s problems were for other people to figure out. People with more power and influence. I mean, I was still trying to get somewhere in my own life. Without everything figured out, how could I be of any help? As I started my career, sure I helped those around me with training, leadership, and a little motivation but I still couldn’t feel the impact of my efforts.
Then I stumbled upon Encouragementology, ok God pushed me but still…it was a revelation beyond all others. People need encouragement. It helps with restoration and rejuvenation of the body and soul, and renewal of the spirit of others and even of those who encourage, according to recent research. Encouragement is vital to child maturation and adult optimal health. The healing benefits of encouragement outweigh criticism and can build self-confidence. And guess what? It’s free, easy to do, SO rewarding, and creates a ripple. When you change the outlook and trajectory of a person, the sky is the limit and there is no telling how high and how far they can go.
We all have needs and encouragement is just one of them…
Over at happonomy.org, I found The Happonomy Human Needs Model
Ariela Paulsen shares 3 Ways to Recognize When Someone Needs Support
How We Can Create Positive “Ripple Effects” Throughout Our Day from Kid President
CHALLENGE: Take notice of those around you who may have quiet needs. You have the power to make a real difference with the actions you take. Listen to understand and take the time to share words of encouragement. It’s free and far-reaching!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 23, 2022
Tuesday Aug 23, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are aimed at interrupting the constant conflict between guilt and forgiveness, perfectionism and self-acceptance. Sometimes this conflict can feel like a Marvel comic with good versus evil and you aren’t sure which side you’re actually on. Have you ever questioned who’s carrying this bottomless guilt or who’s striving for these unreachable heights? You are. Great, now we’re face to face with our nemesis the only thing left is the battle to see who comes out on top. That does seem like the obvious blockbuster outcome but what about taking another route - letting go? Seeking forgiveness and self-acceptance. Breaking the conflict and choosing peace. Well, that may not make it to the box office but a meaningful self-help guide is worth far more.
Let’s start by learning a little more about guilt from goodtherapy.com
Kendra Cherry guides us with Taking the Steps to Forgive Yourself found at verywellmind.com
Dr. Ilene Strauss Cohen offers How to Let Go of the Need to Be Perfect found at psychologytoday.com
CHALLENGE: Tap out the fight as you strive for a better vantage point. Take a look at the bigger picture. Your conflict is with yourself and forgiveness and self-acceptance are a gift waiting for you to accept.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we will get up on the first alarm, check in with our personal goals before we dive into work, and evaluate our priorities all in the attempt to overcome our time management woes. Am I speaking to you? Are you chronically late, overwhelmed, and feeling guilty? When you hear things like; stay calm and carry on, better late than never, a day late a dollar short, does it hit home? Hey, we get it, it’s a busy world we all live in and you are just trying to make your day happen the best you know how. But you know, the buck does not stop there. You can always work toward freedom and find better practices to make your life easier. So get a piece of paper and start a list….one of the many you might want to make in the future to better use the time you are allotted.
Ah time…the only thing we don’t have enough of. Well, I would save Love too but that’s another show. I remember when I was younger and I couldn’t wait to grow up, I couldn’t wait for High School, I should wait to drive, for the weekend, or to be considered an adult. Now, I wonder where all that time went. Today I’m trying to stretch time, shove as much as I can into a work day and make the weekend creep by. I’m trying to hold on to precious moments before they become a memory of the past. Many say age is just a number and that’s true but it’s made up of 24 hours, 7 days a week, 30 days a month, 12 months in a year…..time in our rearview mirror.
Making the most of time is essential. So let’s look at where we spend our time and tips to help us better manage our time, not only for a more productive but a happier life.
Laura Clarke sheds some light on Why some people are always running late found at bbc.com
Over at zenlyorganized.com I found tips to Become a Time-Management Master with These 8 Time Laws
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPK0yeSFge4
Richard Koch on the 80 / 20 Principle
CHALLENGE: value saving time as much as spending it. Make room to find some balance when you schedule out your day. You deserve a meaningful time slot.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are revisiting claiming victory by saving ourselves, tapping into the power we possess. Someone one time...ok actually people ask me all the time, “are you always this happy?”. Or sometimes they phrase it as a statement, “You can NOT be this happy all the time!” And they would be correct but “this happy” is relative. I realize that my mood is my choice and no one can make me feel anything I don’t want to feel. Guess what I want to feel? You got it, HAPPY.
A follow-up question or statement I usually hear next is, “how do you let things roll off your back so easily?” Well the answer to that is, I don’t always. But again, I have to make a conscious effort to let go and move on. The primary reason I find that so doable is, that I don’t like to be in a bad mood. I don’t like the feelings of stress, anxiety, or sadness. I don’t like to be melancholy or irritated. Do you know what I do like? I like to problem solve and divert my attention to things that make me happy, feel creative, or that nourishes my soul. It’s a bonus when I can pick up all three feelings in the same activity.
You have to want to succeed to feel successful.
I also have to consistently check my power and control. These two words can have you soaring or keep you nailed down wondering why you can’t move. Not everything and everyone is under my control and I don’t have the power to change people or the past. If I use those statements as a guide and filter all struggles through them, I find letting go and moving on is really the only option.
What is preventing you from feeling victorious? Remember, the journey of self-discovery is about education, exploration, and enlightenment.
Let’s dig a little deeper into victimization and feeling victimized to understand how to achieve victory.
https://www.whatsyourpower.com/
CHALLENGE: Don’t accept your circumstances without activating your power to choose; your mood, your resolve, and your outcome. Decide your desire for happiness is stronger than your need for control. Let go and move on. Claim victory and celebrate your journey!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we’re exposing those closed-door conversations we have with ourselves. Do you know the ones, the not super uplifting ones? The ones we tend to start our day with, setting the tone for what’s to come. Have you ever questioned why you’re harder on yourself than anyone else you know? Why can’t you seem to forgive past failures or let yourself have a little slack? Well, me either so that’s why we’re here. Let’s dig into this topic a little to seek out the root. I fully believe that when you face your fears, and come head to head with what’s challenging you, you have a chance to change your thinking. You are in control even when you feel powerless. Shame is a dangerous game and the pressure to be perfect is the ultimate recipe for failure.
This topic came to me when I flipped on the light first thing in the morning to prepare for the day and immediately started pummeling myself with ridicule. Whoa, what happened to finding gratitude? I don’t have accessories with encouraging words to remind me of happier thoughts, primarily because Matt said he’s offended when inanimate objects try to tell him how to live. But maybe, I need to surround my mirror with remarks like HEY - before you hit the reject button, you have a beautiful spirit and are going places, lady!
Why do our minds go there so easily? I’m actually pretty confident in myself. If you’ve met me, you would most likely say, I’m outgoing, positive, and encouraging. As an Encouragementologist, those are pretty important traits to possess. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have a bad day or apparently, recurring bad mornings. I’m tired of holding myself to such an impossibly high standard. Why do I believe that’s necessary or even achievable? I love succeeding and hitting goals but if the goals are unattainable, what’s the point?
You can load your house up with motivational quotes, keep a gratitude journal, and set an alarm for your daily mantras but when the door is closed, no one is around, and you are alone with your thoughts. What will you choose?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8Pp7QB6GrE
6 Types of People Who Do Not Deserve to Hear Your Shame Story
CHALLENGE: Be ready to bow out of the shame game by ceasing your participation and reframing the negative narrative you’ve grown accustomed to.
I Know YOU Can Do It!