Self-Centered, Centering One’s Self

March 12, 2019

We’ve all heard it before,  “don’t be selfish”, that person is “self-centered. “Look at him, he’s all about himself”. It’s all about ME! Many of us have been taught the order: God first, then your children, then your spouse, then your family, so on and so on…..”

Why is it that WE continually come in dead last? And more importantly, why are we ok with that? What does it even mean to take care of yourself, and to make yourself a priority? How would you go about doing that?

Let’s start with our emotions. How do you feel? How often do you even stop and “feel”? Sure we feel rushed, or overwhelmed, sad or happy about a situation, concerned or worried for a friend. But, How do WE feel about US?

Putting yourself first can be as easy as doing a mental check-in to see how you are feeling about a situation before you act. Before you stop to consider everyone else’s feelings, consider your own.

Let’s think about a tree with all its many branches and leaves. The tree trunk is vital. It creates stability and carries and distributes all the nutrients to keep it healthy. If the trunk is comprised, everything else suffers. At this rate it may not grow to its full potential, it could bend and stoop while trying to support the weight.  Yep, you guessed it, you are the trunk. It’s important for you to have a solid foundation before you push nutrients to every branch on your tree.

How do you create this stability?

One way is by creating a healthy balance of JOY:

  • Love
  • Friendship
  • Relaxation
  • Success
  • Spirituality

Love: Giving and receiving love from another human being. Family, friends, children, spouses, significant others. Having someone in your life that you are truly connected with -heart, mind, body, and spirit.

Friendship: positive and healthy interactions with other people. People who connect with you on multiple levels, who share your passions, support your goals, celebrate your successes, and comfort your losses.

Relaxation: Quiet time, plenty of sleep, a healthy diet, and consistent doses of joy. Taking time away from the pressures of life to renew your soul.

Success: Setting goals both personally and professionally and celebrating achievements. Receiving appreciation for tasks well done. Taking personal satisfaction from making an impact.

Spirituality: Find time for gratitude  - whatever your religious or non-religious practice may be. Start your day appreciating what you have and the opportunities that lay ahead.


Challenge: Let go of limiting beliefs that say taking care of you is selfish. Instead, spend some time learning what makes you happy, healthy, and fulfilled. Set aside time to focus on YOU, your wants needs, and desires.


I know YOU can do it!