Encouragementology

Mood Matters: How Your Inner World Shapes Your Outer Experience

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are recognizing that moods matter because our inner world dramatically shapes our outer experience.  Have you ever waited on someone—or something—to change the energy in the room, cheer you up, or just make the day feel better? Maybe you’ve thought, “If they’d just smile,” or “If one good thing would happen, maybe I’d feel different.” We’ve all been there, hoping for a rescue from a funk we can’t quite shake. But what if we’ve been giving away way too much power? What if the secret to turning the day around isn’t out there somewhere, but already within us?

In this episode, we’re flipping the script. Instead of waiting for something to shift our mood, we’re exploring how our mood might actually be the thing shifting everything else. How we think, how we feel, how we choose to respond—it all ripples out and shapes what comes next. Could it be that we’re the thermostat, not the thermometer? That we’re not just reacting to the world but co-creating it in real time? Let’s dig into what this means, how to tell when our mindset is steering the ship (and when it’s stuck in a ditch), and how we can use this awareness to show up differently—even when the world around us stays the same.

Let’s kick things off with a truth that feels simple on the surface but hits a little deeper the more you sit with it: your mood shapes your experience more than your experience shapes your mood. We often think we’re reacting to what’s happening around us, but in reality, we’re often reacting to what’s happening within us—and that response colors the whole scene.

This idea leans into what psychologists call “emotional reasoning”—where we believe something is true based solely on how we feel. For example, if I feel overwhelmed, I assume the situation is chaotic. If I feel ignored, I assume people don’t care. But the kicker? The situation may not actually be that bad—it just feels that way because of the emotional lens I’m looking through. It’s like wearing sunglasses indoors and wondering why everything looks dim.

Our brains are wired to scan for threats, to make quick judgments, and to look for evidence that supports how we already feel. That’s called confirmation bias, and when we’re in a funk, our minds will happily hand us proof that the day is, in fact, garbage. But here’s the good news: once you realize this, you can interrupt the loop. You can change the glasses, so to speak. You can take back control of your mood and, with it, the way you engage with the world.

So rather than waiting for something outside of you to cheer you up or “fix” the day, what if you became your own emotional thermostat? Not to fake positivity or push feelings aside—but to gently shift how you interpret the moment, choose your response, and create a ripple effect from the inside out.

Dr. Beth Kurland gives us some insight on How to Shift Perspective When You're Stuck in Your Own Way, found a Psychology Today  

Carole Fossey declares Whether You Believe You Can or Believe You Can’t, You Are Right found on LinkedIn

Dr. Tracey Marks on Why you’re an emotional sponge and 5 Tips for Better Boundaries

CHALLENGE: Take ownership of your mood today. Recognize that by adjusting your internal narrative, you have the power to transform not only your own experience but also the world around you. Enjoy this new found freedom.

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Unspoken: How Body Language Communicates What Words Can’t

SHOW NOTES:

On this show… we are exploring the unspoken to learn how body language communicates what words can’t.  Have you ever walked into a room and immediately felt something… off? No one said a word, but somehow, you just knew—you weren’t welcome at that table, or someone just had an argument in the kitchen. That’s the beauty (and sometimes the awkwardness) of body language. It speaks loud and clear—even when our mouths are saying, “I’m fine!”

In this episode, we’re digging into all those silent signals we send—whether we mean to or not. From the crossed arms that scream “I’m not open to feedback,” to the smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes… we’re decoding what’s really being said when nothing’s being said at all. Body language isn’t just a sideshow to the conversation—it is the conversation. And once you learn to read it (and manage your own), you’ll start to feel more connected, more confident, and—yes—even a little more in control of how you’re coming across.

Let’s take a closer look at the language we’ve all been speaking since before we said our first words. You might just be surprised what your body’s been saying behind your back.

I’ll start by stating the obvious… but also the often-overlooked: we’re talking all the time—even when we’re not saying a word. Whether it’s the way we cross our arms, how long we hold eye contact, or the way our faces betray us mid-sentence, body language is this constant, silent sidekick to our spoken communication. And more often than not, it’s doing the real talking.

Body language is made up of all the nonverbal cues we use to express ourselves—things like facial expressions, posture, gestures, eye movements, even how close we stand to someone. It’s a full-blown language… just without the dictionary. According to researchers, nonverbal communication can account for up to 70–90% of how our messages are received. Which means the tone of your voice and the look on your face might be saying more than your words ever could.

And here’s the kicker: while we’re often very aware of what we say, we’re not nearly as tuned in to what our bodies are saying. That can lead to all kinds of mixed messages—like smiling while delivering bad news (awkward), or nodding when you actually disagree. We don’t always realize what we’re broadcasting.

There are also cultural differences to consider. What feels like an innocent gesture in one country might be offensive in another. And what seems like eye contact to you might feel like a stare-down to someone else. So body language isn’t one-size-fits-all—but it is universal in the sense that we’re all doing it, all the time.

So, why does this matter? Because when we become more aware of our own nonverbal habits—and better at reading others’—we show up more authentically. We connect more deeply. We avoid unnecessary misunderstandings. And we walk away from interactions not just having talked, but having been heard and understood.

Wendy Rose Gould offers 7 Body Language Mistakes You Don't Know You're Making -Plus effective pro-tips on improving non-verbal communication.

Tom Morrison explains What Your Body Language Says About Your Leadership Impact

Let’s learn even more from the expert, Vanessa Van Edwards, as she describes Learn 7 Body Language Secrets 

CHALLENGE: Become more conscious of your nonverbal cues and observe how they influence your interactions. By aligning your body language with your intentions, you can foster more genuine and impactful connections. Show up as you, fully you.

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Manifesting Your Destiny: Embracing Personal Responsibility to Shape Your Future

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are embracing personal responsibility to shape our futures as we manifest our destiny. Have you ever paused to consider the role you play in crafting your own life story? It’s a compelling notion that the outcomes we experience—both triumphs and setbacks—are not merely products of chance, but reflections of our own intentions and actions. This perspective invites us to delve into the profound connection between our thoughts, behaviors, and the realities we encounter.

 

In this episode, we’re embarking on an enlightening journey to explore the concept that “that which we manifest is before us.” We’ll unravel how our conscious and unconscious choices shape our destinies, and how embracing personal responsibility can empower us to steer our lives toward fulfillment and purpose. This isn’t about casting shadows of blame, but about illuminating the paths of possibility that open up when we acknowledge our role as architects of our own fate.

Let’s kick things off by getting on the same page about what we’re really talking about when we say, “That which we manifest is before us.” Sounds poetic, maybe even mystical, right? But it’s actually a lot more practical—and empowering—than it might seem at first glance.

Manifestation is the idea that the thoughts we think, the intentions we set, and the beliefs we hold have a powerful influence over the reality we experience. It’s not just about wishing for something and hoping it appears out of thin air—it’s about recognizing the role our mindset, choices, and focus play in shaping our path. It’s like planting seeds in a garden: the quality of your thoughts determines what grows, and your effort is what brings it to life.

Now let’s pair that with personal responsibility—the idea that we are not just passive observers of our lives, but active participants. This doesn’t mean blaming ourselves for every hiccup or hardship. Life happens, and some things are out of our control. But when we step back and really look at our habits, our self-talk, our patterns—what we believe about what we’re capable of—we often find that we’ve played a bigger role in our outcomes than we realized.

Here’s where it gets really interesting: we’re always manifesting—whether we know it or not. Through action or inaction. Through clarity or confusion. If you’ve ever said, “I knew this was going to happen,” good or bad, chances are… that thought planted a seed. And when we’re not clear about what we want, or when we let fear and limiting beliefs steer the wheel, we can manifest outcomes that don’t serve us—outcomes that feel like they just “happened” to us, when really, we helped create the conditions.

So no, this isn’t about magical thinking—it’s about mindful thinking. It’s about checking in with yourself and asking, “What am I putting out into the world through my energy, choices, and beliefs?” Because more often than not, that’s exactly what shows up in front of you.

Dr. Tchiki Davis on “What Is Manifestation? Science-Based Ways to Manifest” from Psychology Today. 

Alright, let’s break this down—manifestation in a nutshell.

First, manifestation isn’t magic. It’s not about wishing really hard and waiting for the universe to deliver your dream on a silver platter. Instead, it’s about aligning your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors to move toward the life you want.

Second, your mindset matters—a lot. What you believe about yourself and your future can shape your motivation, your resilience, and even how you interpret setbacks. A strong, focused mindset helps you stay committed and open to opportunity.

Third, action is key. You can visualize the perfect job, the dream relationship, or the peaceful life—but unless you’re taking consistent steps in that direction, you’re just daydreaming. Manifestation works best when your intention meets effort.

And finally, positive thinking alone isn’t enough—you also need clarity, self-awareness, and a willingness to grow through challenges. It’s about co-creating your life with purpose, not passively hoping everything will work out.

Focus on What You Can Control, Leave What You Can't by Hannah Briame at Becoming Who You Are

Mel Robbins hosted Dr. James Doty to talk about Manifestation

CHALLENGE: Take a moment to reflect on an area of your life where you’d like to see change. Identify one specific goal, visualize the outcome, and outline the steps you’ll take to achieve it. Embrace your role as the creator of your destiny, and watch as your intentions transform into reality.

I Know YOU Can Do It!

The Certainty Trap: Are You as Right as You Think?

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are attempting to avoid the Certainty Trap by asking, "Are you as right as you think you are?" Have you ever felt so sure you were right about something, only to later discover there was more to the story—or a completely different side you hadn’t considered? That moment can be humbling, even a little uncomfortable, but it’s also where growth begins.

We’ve all been there—standing our ground, convinced that our perspective is the correct one. Whether it’s a debate about current events, a disagreement in a relationship, or simply our interpretation of a situation, we often hold tightly to our beliefs. In this episode, we’re diving into the human tendency to cling to certainty, even when we might not have all the facts. We’ll explore the importance of self-awareness, the value of considering opposing viewpoints, and how embracing a bit of uncertainty can lead to personal growth and deeper connections with others. So, let’s challenge our assumptions and open the door to new perspectives—who knows what we might discover?

Let’s start by calling out the very human thing we all do: we like to be right. I mean, who doesn’t? Being right feels good—it’s validating, it’s safe, and it gives us a sense of control. But the brain takes it a step further. Scientifically speaking, our brains are wired to protect our current beliefs. We’re not just thinking—we’re filtering, editing, and defending. This is thanks to something called confirmation bias, which is your brain’s way of saying, “Let’s only pay attention to the stuff that proves we already know what we’re talking about.”

Here’s a real-life example: you’ve decided your partner never listens to you. So, every time they forget something you said—ding ding ding—more proof. But when they do listen? You might not notice. Or maybe you write it off as a fluke. That’s confirmation bias in action. You’re scanning for evidence that supports what you already believe and quietly ignoring what doesn’t fit.

Then there’s overconfidence bias, which is exactly what it sounds like: thinking we know more than we do. Ever found yourself mid-debate, completely certain about a “fact” you read online… only to later realize you misread it or, oops, it was a meme? Yeah, same. Our brains often give us the feeling of being right before we’ve actually done the homework. And once we’re feeling confident, our openness to alternative views tends to shrink like jeans in the dryer.

Now, let’s turn the mirror inward. It’s time for a little self-reflection:

Recall a Recent Disagreement: Think about a recent situation where you were convinced you were right. What was the topic? Who were you discussing it with?

Identify Your Sources: What information did you base your opinion on? Was it firsthand experience, something you read, or perhaps information from someone you trust?

Consider the Other Perspective: What was the other person’s viewpoint? Can you understand why they might see things differently?

Assess Your Openness: During the discussion, were you genuinely open to hearing the other side, or were you more focused on proving your point?

Reflect on the Outcome: How did the conversation end? Did you learn something new, or did it reinforce your original belief?

By engaging in this exercise, you may uncover patterns in your thinking and identify areas where you can be more receptive to differing viewpoints.

Dr. David W. Johnson with “The Importance of Taking the Perspective of Others.” Found at Psychology Today

Certainty Is a Psychological Trap and It's Time to Escape also found at Psychology Today

Let’s go to the well….Annie Duke explains why being uncertain is a hidden strength 

CHALLENGE: Identify one belief or opinion you hold with absolute certainty and actively seek out information or perspectives that challenge it. Embrace the discomfort of uncertainty, and observe how this openness can lead to deeper understanding and personal growth. Remember, true wisdom often begins with the acknowledgment of what we don’t know. 

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Beyond Comfort: Embracing Growth by Stepping Outside Your Comfort Zone

SHOW NOTES:

On this show… we are going beyond comfort as we step outside of our comfort zones and embrace growth. We’ve all been there—nestled comfortably in our routines, sipping the same coffee, walking the same paths, and binge-watching that favorite series for the umpteenth time. It’s cozy, predictable, and safe. But have you ever wondered what lies beyond that snug bubble? What adventures, opportunities, and personal growth await when you dare to venture into the unknown?

Stepping outside your comfort zone isn’t just a catchy phrase; it’s a transformative journey that challenges your fears, bolsters your confidence, and shatters those pesky limiting beliefs. In this episode,  we’ll explore the exhilarating (and sometimes nerve-wracking) world beyond our comfort zones. From understanding the psychology behind our fears to uncovering the hidden costs of staying stagnant, we’ll navigate this path together to discover how embracing discomfort can lead to unparalleled personal growth.

Let’s start at the beginning—what exactly is a “comfort zone”? Sounds cozy, right? Like fuzzy socks, predictable routines, and your favorite Netflix binge. But in psychological terms, your comfort zone is more than just what feels familiar. It’s a behavioral space where your activities and decisions fit a routine and pattern that minimizes stress and risk. Inside it, you’re cruising—things feel manageable, safe, and under control. But spoiler alert: not much growth happens there.

Now, stepping outside of that bubble? That’s where things get interesting. Psychologists have mapped this out into zones: beyond the comfort zone lies the learning zone, where you face new challenges, gain skills, and build resilience. Keep going and you’ll hit the growth zone—this is where purpose, confidence, and real transformation happen. It’s the place where you say yes to the things that scare you a little but excite you a lot. The catch? It’s also where the uncertainty lives. The fear. The doubt. That tiny inner voice that says, “Yeah but… what if I fail?”

And hey, that voice has a point—there is risk involved. But there’s also risk in staying stuck. The longer we stay in our bubble, the more we reinforce limiting beliefs—like “I’m not good at that,” or “That’s just not who I am.” These beliefs become like padded walls, keeping us “safe,” but also keeping us small. And here’s the wild part: you might not even realize you’re stuck. You might just feel low-grade frustration, boredom, or restlessness—like something’s missing but you can’t quite name it. That’s often your potential, knocking on the door, wondering when you’re going to invite it in.

Is It Time to Leave Your Comfort Zone? How Leaving Can Spark Positive Change

Michael Hyatt asks and answers; Are Your Beliefs Keeping You Stuck? Found on Full Focus

Joey Schweitzer on How the comfort zone is ruining your life

Here are five powerful ways to challenge limiting beliefs

1. Talk Back to the Voice in Your Head

You know the one. That inner critic that says, “You’re not good at this,” or “Who do you think you are?” Call it out! Literally question it like a nosy neighbor:

• Says who?”

• “Is that actually true or just something I picked up along the way?”

When you start treating those beliefs like suggestions instead of facts, you regain control of the narrative.

2. Look for the Evidence (and the Holes)

Take your limiting belief and pretend you’re a lawyer trying to prove or disprove it.

• Belief: “I’m not creative.”
• Evidence: Have you ever solved a problem in a new way? Cooked without a recipe? Decorated a space? Boom—creative.

Most limiting beliefs fall apart under even the gentlest cross-examination.

3. Reframe the Story

Instead of saying “I always mess this up,” try “I’m still learning, and each attempt gets me closer.”

Reframing isn’t lying to yourself—it’s choosing a perspective that empowers instead of paralyzes you. Think of it like adjusting the lens on your camera: same scene, better focus.

4. Take Micro-Actions That Prove It Wrong

One of the fastest ways to challenge a belief is to act in spite of it.

If you believe, “I’m not confident speaking up,” try asking a question in a meeting. Tiny actions stack up. And each time you do the thing you thought you couldn’t, that belief loses its power.

5. Borrow Someone Else’s Belief

When your self-belief is shaky, lean on someone who sees you clearly. A coach, friend, mentor—someone who’s rooting for you.

Ask, “What do you see in me that I’m missing?” Sometimes we need to borrow confidence until we build our own.

CHALLENGE: Identify one area in your life where fear or complacency has kept you confined. Take a deliberate step this week to push beyond that boundary, no matter how small, and embrace the growth that awaits on the other side. Remember, life begins at the end of your comfort zone. 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Emotional Shape-Shifting: Adapting Emotions in Social Situations

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are diving into the idea of emotional shape-shifting or adapting our emotions and behaviors in different social situations. Have you ever found yourself slipping into the role of mood manager—filling awkward silences, lifting a heavy atmosphere, or shifting your tone just to keep the peace? Maybe you’ve walked into a room, scanned the emotional temperature, and instinctively adjusted yourself to fit in, smoothing out discomfort like a social glue stick. If so, congratulations! You might be what I like to call an Emotional Shape-Shifter—the person who intuitively adapts to meet others where they are. Sounds like a superpower, right? And in many ways, it is. This kind of emotional adaptability can build connections, ease tensions, and make you the go-to person for support and social harmony. But here’s the catch—when does being flexible turn into being too flexible? At what point do we stop adjusting and start erasing ourselves?

Think about it - constantly mirroring other people’s moods can be exhausting! If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation feeling emotionally drained—like you just carried the weight of someone else’s energy—you’re not alone. As a self-proclaimed shifter, I wanted to know, is emotional shape-shifting simply a form of empathy, or is it a close cousin of people-pleasing? And more importantly, how do we keep the good parts of this trait while setting boundaries that protect our own emotional well-being? Today, we’re diving into the art of emotional adaptability—when it’s a strength, when it’s a slippery slope, and how to find the balance between connection and self-preservation.

I was talking to a friend of mine about this idea and referred to myself as “the goo”...sounds weird, but think about it. Goo fills empty space. 

Ever notice how you become a slightly different version of yourself depending on who you’re with or where you are? This isn’t about being fake – it’s something psychologists might call emotional shape-shifting, and it’s actually a normal part of human behavior. Emotional shape-shifting can be defined as the process of adjusting or changing your emotional expression to suit different situations or people. It draws on our capacity for emotional regulation – the ability to control or modulate our feelings – and on emotional mirroring, where we unconsciously mimic another person’s emotions to connect with them. In other words, it’s like being an “emotional chameleon”, instinctively adapting to the social environment to blend in or put others at ease.

Over at Psych Central, Hope Gillette tells us about Practicing Authenticity When You're Socially Adapting

There are no set criteria that define someone as a social chameleon, but common traits can include:

 

Empathy: Recognizing, relating, and responding to the thoughts and feelings of others.

Adaptability: Being able to change your behavior readily in different situations.

Open-mindedness: Always searching for a common ground with others’ beliefs and interests.

Social awareness: Being keen to subtle social cues, like body language, or shifts in others’ moods and behaviors.

Effective communication: Offering clear, engaging conversation and active listening.

Displaying interest: Asking questions and displaying interest in someone else’s passion.

Mimicking movements: Taking on movements of another to convey shared experiences, like smiling, nodding, or arm crossing.

 

At Medical News Today, Zawn Villines gives us some insight on People pleasers: What it means and how to stop

On the School of Life’s YouTube Channel, I found How to Stop Being a People Pleaser

CHALLENGE: Be intentional with your own emotional shape-shifting – adapt to others when it feels right, but never at the cost of your true feelings and needs. Stay flexible and empathetic, yes, but also fiercely protective of your authenticity and personal boundaries.

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

From Dreams to Reality: Taking Action to Live Your Best Life

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are turning dreams into reality as we take action to live our best lives. Have you ever caught yourself saying, “One day, I’m going to…” or “I wish I could…” only to let time slip by without taking action? Maybe you’ve dreamed of starting your own business, writing a book, switching careers, or finally diving into that passion project you can’t stop thinking about. But somehow, between responsibilities, self-doubt, and the comfort of routine, those dreams get placed on the back burner. And the longer they sit, the easier it is to convince yourself that now just isn’t the right time. But let’s be real—if we wait for the perfect time, we might be waiting forever. So, what’s really holding us back? Is it fear? Lack of direction? The security of staying where we are, even if it isn’t fulfilling?

Today, we’re going to uncover the real reasons we stall on our dreams and, more importantly, how to break through the hesitation and take action. Because here’s the truth: the difference between “I wish” and “I did” is action. And that doesn’t mean making a drastic leap overnight—it means taking one small, intentional step in the right direction. Whether you’re looking to reinvent your career, start a side hustle for joy rather than money, or simply make progress toward something you love, this episode is for you. Let’s talk about the power of forward motion, break out of the predictable patterns that keep us stuck, and create a real, scalable plan to move from dreaming to doing. It’s time to get up and get going!

From the start, I had entrepreneurial aspirations! Not really sure why that is. I didn’t come from a family of entrepreneurs. My father was a professor and my mother a stay-at-home mother but as early as I can remember, I was creating opportunity. Not everything was a money-maker or even successful but that wasn’t really the most exciting part for me. It was the idea that turned into action. I saw opportunity everywhere. For instance, my neighbors were out of town and we had a big storm in my neighborhood. This took down a very large tree in their backyard. After an initial inspection I decided it would be cool to give neighborhood children a tour for a small entrance fee. After coming up with some compelling and elaborate stories about each nook and cranny of the fallen tree, we gave tours all day and made enough money to walk to town and treat ourselves with some goodies. 

Now, I realize there is a time and place for any genius idea so I’m not suggesting checking the weather channel for the next big storm but I tell this story to say, what can you engineer from just a creative thought?

Let’s take a moment for some self-reflection. Grab a pen and paper, or open a notes app, and jot down your answers to these questions:

• What is a dream or passion you’ve been putting off?

Think about something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t pursued yet.

• What fears or doubts have been holding you back?

Be honest with yourself—acknowledge any fear of failure, fear of success, or comfort in routine that’s keeping you from taking action.

• What small step can you take this week toward that dream?

Identify a manageable action that moves you closer to your goal, whether it’s researching, networking, or dedicating time to your passion.

The Real Reason You’re Afraid To Chase Your Dreams - from Bren on the Road

When asked…How can we overcome the fear of pursuing our dreams?. Deepak Chopra

At Observing Leslie, I found How the Obsession with Monetizing Hurts Us

On Gabby Bernstein’s YouTube channel, I found The First Step in Taking Action on Your Dream

CHALLENGE: Stop waiting for the “right time” and take the first bold step toward your dream today. Trust yourself, embrace the excitement of the unknown, and start creating the life you’ve been dreaming about—because the only thing standing between you and your future is action!

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Beyond the Hammer: Expanding Your Toolbox for Life’s Challenges

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are going beyond the hammer as we strive to expand our toolbox to handle life’s challenges. Have you ever found yourself approaching every problem with the same solution, even when it’s not the best fit? Maybe you’re the “tough love” person, doling out hard truths when sometimes a little empathy would go further. Or maybe you’re the peacemaker, smoothing things over when what’s really needed is some constructive conflict. We all have our go-to tools, and when they work, they work—but what about when they don’t? That’s why we’re exploring this top of: If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. This well-known idiom, also called Maslow’s hammer or the law of the instrument, describes our tendency to over-rely on familiar methods, even when they aren’t the best solution.

Think about it: if a hammer is all you know, you’re going to swing at every challenge like it’s a bent nail. But life is full of problems that don’t require brute force—some need a screwdriver, a paintbrush, or maybe just a step back to reassess the whole project. The key to personal and professional growth is recognizing when it’s time to expand your toolbox. Today, we’re exploring why we default to certain ways of thinking, how this impacts our decision-making, and most importantly, how we can cultivate a more adaptable and creative approach to life’s challenges. Let’s trade in our hammers for a full set of tools and learn how to use them!

Test Your Toolbox

Now, let’s put your hammer to the test. Consider the following scenarios and think about how you would instinctively respond. Then, challenge yourself to consider an alternative approach.

🔨 Scenario 1: A friend is venting about a frustrating work situation.

• Your Hammer Response: Do you immediately jump in with advice on how to fix it?
• Alternative Approach: Instead, what if you just listened and validated their feelings?

🔨 Scenario 2: Your team at work isn’t meeting expectations.

• Your Hammer Response: Do you tighten control and micromanage?
• Alternative Approach: What if you opened a dialogue to understand their challenges and adjusted expectations accordingly?

🔨 Scenario 3: You’re overwhelmed with a busy schedule.

• Your Hammer Response: Do you push through, working harder without considering other options?
• Alternative Approach: Could you delegate, restructure your time, or simply ask for help?

Dr. Justin James Kennedy explores Unlocking the Power of Cognitive Diversity found at Psychology Today

Ben Janse explains Systematic Inventive Thinking (SIT) found at Tools Hero

On the Mental Models Daily YouTube channel, I found some additional real-life examples of Maslow’s Hammer.

CHALLENGE: Recognize when you’re reaching for your proverbial hammer and consider alternative tools. Embrace new perspectives and strategies to enrich your problem-solving repertoire.

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Feeding the Right Wolf: Balancing Your Inner Emotions

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we are balancing our inner emotions as we decide, which wolf to feed. Ever feel like there’s a tug-of-war happening inside you? One part of you wants to lounge on the couch, scrolling endlessly, indulging in snacks, and just existing in cozy bliss. Meanwhile, the other side is nagging at you—reminding you of the gym membership you’re paying for, the book you said you’d read, or that goal you promised yourself you’d chase. It’s an internal battle, and let’s be honest, some days, the lazy wolf wins. But what if I told you that this struggle isn’t just about self-discipline or willpower? It’s a deeper, universal experience that has been described for generations through the ancient Cherokee story of the two wolves.

According to this tale, inside each of us live two wolves: one represents negativity—anger, jealousy, regret, self-doubt—while the other embodies positivity—love, kindness, hope, and gratitude. They are constantly at odds, each vying for dominance over our thoughts, reactions, and ultimately, our lives. The question is: which wolf wins? The answer is simple but powerful—the one you feed. On this show, we’re diving deep into this idea, exploring the dangers of leaning too far in either direction and most importantly, how to maintain a healthy balance. Because let’s face it, we’re all human. Sometimes, the negative wolf gets a few too many scraps, but the good news? We can always make a conscious choice to shift our focus, change our perspective, and start feeding the right wolf again.

Let’s do a little test to see if you can recognize which wolf is speaking in different situations. I’m going to give you a few common thoughts we all experience, and I want you to guess which wolf is talking—positive or negative. No overthinking, just go with your gut.

• “I’ll never be good at this, so why even try?”

• “I messed up, but I can learn from this and do better next time.”

• “Everyone else has it figured out. I’m so far behind.”

• “I’m proud of how far I’ve come, even if I’m not where I want to be yet.”

• “I don’t trust people. Every time I let my guard down, I get hurt.”

• “There are good people in the world. I just have to find the right ones.”

How did you do? It’s pretty clear once you break it down, right? The negative wolf thrives on absolutes—never, always, no one, everyone—and it feeds on doubt, fear, and comparison. The positive wolf, on the other hand, embraces growth, possibility, and resilience.

When the Wolves Wear Disguises

Here’s where it gets tricky—sometimes, the negative wolf pretends to be the positive wolf to keep its grip on you. Have you ever told yourself:

• “I just expect the worst so I won’t be disappointed.”
• “I’m not being negative, I’m just being realistic.”
• “If I don’t trust people, they can’t hurt me.”

These thoughts feel like self-protection, but in reality, they’re fear in disguise. The negative wolf doesn’t just show up as anger or sadness—it can creep in as cynicism, overthinking, or even perfectionism.

Courtney E. Ackerman asks about Positive and Negative Emotions: Do We Need Both? Found at Positive Psychology

Ria Bhagwat claims 'Lemonading' Is the Life Strategy That'll Make You Happier (and There's Science to Prove It) found at Real Simple

On the Anasazi Foundation’s YouTube channel, I found THE LEGEND OF THE TWO WOLVES || Native American Legend

CHALLENGE: This week, observe which wolf you’re feeding with your thoughts and actions. Make conscious choices to nourish your positive wolf, and watch how your inner landscape transforms.

I Know YOU Can Do It!

Anxiety or Excitement? Mastering Your Mind’s Balancing Act

SHOW NOTES:

On this show…we’re cracking open the psychology of emotions, specifically the fine line between anxiety and excitement. Have you ever found yourself on the edge of a thrilling adventure, heart racing, palms sweaty, only to wonder: “Am I anxious or just excited?” If so, you’re not alone. Anxiety and excitement are emotional doppelgängers, mirroring each other in physical symptoms—rapid heartbeat, fluttering stomach, and that all-too-familiar rush of adrenaline. But here’s the twist: our mind plays the role of narrator, deciding whether this moment is a threat to be feared or an opportunity to be embraced. And once we slap a label on it, we start acting accordingly. Anxiety gets thrown around far too often, and when we’re quick to diagnose every feeling of nervous energy as anxiety, we inadvertently give it more power than it deserves. 

But what if, instead, we took a step back and questioned whether we’re actually afraid… or just excited? By shifting the way we interpret our body’s signals, we can reframe anxious energy into something productive—enthusiasm, motivation, even joy! We’ll explore how this mindset shift works, test out ways to tell the difference and dive into strategies to regain control over our thoughts. If you’ve ever mistaken nerves for negativity or let anxiety hold you back, this episode will help you take back the reins. So, deep breath—let’s go!

Anxiety and excitement are like two sides of the same coin. Physiologically, both can make your heart race, palms sweat, and mind buzz. The key difference? It’s all about perception. Anxiety often stems from anticipating a negative outcome, while excitement is rooted in positive expectations. Recognizing this distinction is the first step in mastering our emotional responses.

right now.

Mind Flip Challenge:

1. Think back to a moment when you felt nervous energy. Maybe it was before a speech, a first date, or a big change.
2. Replay the scene in your mind—what was your body doing? Heart racing? Hands tingling?
3. Now, flip the script. Instead of saying, “I was so anxious,” say, “I was actually really excited.” Feel the difference?
4. Take it a step further: When you experience those same feelings in the future, try saying out loud, “I’m excited!”—even if you don’t fully believe it at first. You’re rewiring your brain, one phrase at a time.

Dr. Yanet Vanegas details Transforming Anxiety: How to Turn Worry Into Success - Harness the power of anxiety to fuel your motivation and achieve your goals. Found at Psychology Today

Megan Anna Neff declares Feelings Are Not Facts: How to Identify Experience from Reality found at Neurodivergent Insights

Olga Khazan from the Atlantic’s YouTube channel: How to Turn Anxiety Into Excitement

CHALLENGE: Next time anxiety knocks, greet it with excitement. Embrace the energy and let it propel you forward. Instead of fearing the moment, step into it with confidence, knowing that you have the power to shape your own experience.

I Know YOU Can Do It!