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Weekly topics covering life‘s challenges with a positive spin and a new perspective. It‘s time to connect, learn, and grow!
Episodes
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
Tuesday Aug 30, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are stepping up and taking notice of the needs around us and in ourselves. Feeling frustrated and small when it comes to the problems all around you? You are not alone. No matter how big the problem is or seems, you can make a powerful impact, today, right this second. All you have to do is notice and take action. You might be asking “what can I do?” that’s right but this time say it with conviction; “What CAN I do?” and then be willing to pitch in. Just like challenges can seem huge solutions can be small. Your efforts can help one person immensely or inspire more to help many. Either way, your actions have an impact.
I used to have that same mindset. The world’s problems were for other people to figure out. People with more power and influence. I mean, I was still trying to get somewhere in my own life. Without everything figured out, how could I be of any help? As I started my career, sure I helped those around me with training, leadership, and a little motivation but I still couldn’t feel the impact of my efforts.
Then I stumbled upon Encouragementology, ok God pushed me but still…it was a revelation beyond all others. People need encouragement. It helps with restoration and rejuvenation of the body and soul, and renewal of the spirit of others and even of those who encourage, according to recent research. Encouragement is vital to child maturation and adult optimal health. The healing benefits of encouragement outweigh criticism and can build self-confidence. And guess what? It’s free, easy to do, SO rewarding, and creates a ripple. When you change the outlook and trajectory of a person, the sky is the limit and there is no telling how high and how far they can go.
We all have needs and encouragement is just one of them…
Over at happonomy.org, I found The Happonomy Human Needs Model
Ariela Paulsen shares 3 Ways to Recognize When Someone Needs Support
How We Can Create Positive “Ripple Effects” Throughout Our Day from Kid President
CHALLENGE: Take notice of those around you who may have quiet needs. You have the power to make a real difference with the actions you take. Listen to understand and take the time to share words of encouragement. It’s free and far-reaching!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 23, 2022
Tuesday Aug 23, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are aimed at interrupting the constant conflict between guilt and forgiveness, perfectionism and self-acceptance. Sometimes this conflict can feel like a Marvel comic with good versus evil and you aren’t sure which side you’re actually on. Have you ever questioned who’s carrying this bottomless guilt or who’s striving for these unreachable heights? You are. Great, now we’re face to face with our nemesis the only thing left is the battle to see who comes out on top. That does seem like the obvious blockbuster outcome but what about taking another route - letting go? Seeking forgiveness and self-acceptance. Breaking the conflict and choosing peace. Well, that may not make it to the box office but a meaningful self-help guide is worth far more.
Let’s start by learning a little more about guilt from goodtherapy.com
Kendra Cherry guides us with Taking the Steps to Forgive Yourself found at verywellmind.com
Dr. Ilene Strauss Cohen offers How to Let Go of the Need to Be Perfect found at psychologytoday.com
CHALLENGE: Tap out the fight as you strive for a better vantage point. Take a look at the bigger picture. Your conflict is with yourself and forgiveness and self-acceptance are a gift waiting for you to accept.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
Tuesday Aug 16, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we will get up on the first alarm, check in with our personal goals before we dive into work, and evaluate our priorities all in the attempt to overcome our time management woes. Am I speaking to you? Are you chronically late, overwhelmed, and feeling guilty? When you hear things like; stay calm and carry on, better late than never, a day late a dollar short, does it hit home? Hey, we get it, it’s a busy world we all live in and you are just trying to make your day happen the best you know how. But you know, the buck does not stop there. You can always work toward freedom and find better practices to make your life easier. So get a piece of paper and start a list….one of the many you might want to make in the future to better use the time you are allotted.
Ah time…the only thing we don’t have enough of. Well, I would save Love too but that’s another show. I remember when I was younger and I couldn’t wait to grow up, I couldn’t wait for High School, I should wait to drive, for the weekend, or to be considered an adult. Now, I wonder where all that time went. Today I’m trying to stretch time, shove as much as I can into a work day and make the weekend creep by. I’m trying to hold on to precious moments before they become a memory of the past. Many say age is just a number and that’s true but it’s made up of 24 hours, 7 days a week, 30 days a month, 12 months in a year…..time in our rearview mirror.
Making the most of time is essential. So let’s look at where we spend our time and tips to help us better manage our time, not only for a more productive but a happier life.
Laura Clarke sheds some light on Why some people are always running late found at bbc.com
Over at zenlyorganized.com I found tips to Become a Time-Management Master with These 8 Time Laws
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPK0yeSFge4
Richard Koch on the 80 / 20 Principle
CHALLENGE: value saving time as much as spending it. Make room to find some balance when you schedule out your day. You deserve a meaningful time slot.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
Tuesday Aug 09, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are revisiting claiming victory by saving ourselves, tapping into the power we possess. Someone one time...ok actually people ask me all the time, “are you always this happy?”. Or sometimes they phrase it as a statement, “You can NOT be this happy all the time!” And they would be correct but “this happy” is relative. I realize that my mood is my choice and no one can make me feel anything I don’t want to feel. Guess what I want to feel? You got it, HAPPY.
A follow-up question or statement I usually hear next is, “how do you let things roll off your back so easily?” Well the answer to that is, I don’t always. But again, I have to make a conscious effort to let go and move on. The primary reason I find that so doable is, that I don’t like to be in a bad mood. I don’t like the feelings of stress, anxiety, or sadness. I don’t like to be melancholy or irritated. Do you know what I do like? I like to problem solve and divert my attention to things that make me happy, feel creative, or that nourishes my soul. It’s a bonus when I can pick up all three feelings in the same activity.
You have to want to succeed to feel successful.
I also have to consistently check my power and control. These two words can have you soaring or keep you nailed down wondering why you can’t move. Not everything and everyone is under my control and I don’t have the power to change people or the past. If I use those statements as a guide and filter all struggles through them, I find letting go and moving on is really the only option.
What is preventing you from feeling victorious? Remember, the journey of self-discovery is about education, exploration, and enlightenment.
Let’s dig a little deeper into victimization and feeling victimized to understand how to achieve victory.
https://www.whatsyourpower.com/
CHALLENGE: Don’t accept your circumstances without activating your power to choose; your mood, your resolve, and your outcome. Decide your desire for happiness is stronger than your need for control. Let go and move on. Claim victory and celebrate your journey!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
Tuesday Aug 02, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we’re exposing those closed-door conversations we have with ourselves. Do you know the ones, the not super uplifting ones? The ones we tend to start our day with, setting the tone for what’s to come. Have you ever questioned why you’re harder on yourself than anyone else you know? Why can’t you seem to forgive past failures or let yourself have a little slack? Well, me either so that’s why we’re here. Let’s dig into this topic a little to seek out the root. I fully believe that when you face your fears, and come head to head with what’s challenging you, you have a chance to change your thinking. You are in control even when you feel powerless. Shame is a dangerous game and the pressure to be perfect is the ultimate recipe for failure.
This topic came to me when I flipped on the light first thing in the morning to prepare for the day and immediately started pummeling myself with ridicule. Whoa, what happened to finding gratitude? I don’t have accessories with encouraging words to remind me of happier thoughts, primarily because Matt said he’s offended when inanimate objects try to tell him how to live. But maybe, I need to surround my mirror with remarks like HEY - before you hit the reject button, you have a beautiful spirit and are going places, lady!
Why do our minds go there so easily? I’m actually pretty confident in myself. If you’ve met me, you would most likely say, I’m outgoing, positive, and encouraging. As an Encouragementologist, those are pretty important traits to possess. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have a bad day or apparently, recurring bad mornings. I’m tired of holding myself to such an impossibly high standard. Why do I believe that’s necessary or even achievable? I love succeeding and hitting goals but if the goals are unattainable, what’s the point?
You can load your house up with motivational quotes, keep a gratitude journal, and set an alarm for your daily mantras but when the door is closed, no one is around, and you are alone with your thoughts. What will you choose?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8Pp7QB6GrE
6 Types of People Who Do Not Deserve to Hear Your Shame Story
CHALLENGE: Be ready to bow out of the shame game by ceasing your participation and reframing the negative narrative you’ve grown accustomed to.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Jul 26, 2022
Tuesday Jul 26, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are committed to paying attention, not to just me but to our own minds, thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It’s time to own it instead of being an innocent bystander. This is your life and you get to determine how well or how poorly, you participate. This could be fun! Have you ever wondered why you think the way you do or why you say what you say? Have you ever stopped to consider how that thinking and verbalization could impact others? Everyone has to do their part, too. No one is disconnected. And everyone has to improve their skills, take care of their own health to the extent they can and contribute their time and talents to the community and country. ~Tim Ryan
If you buy into this idea then it’s more important than ever to be aware of yourself; your thoughts and your actions.
There are so many thoughts and opinions flying around and if you want to stay true to yourself, you find yourself bobbing and weaving, ducking the loaded viewpoint bombs until you can get to a safe place and sit with your own ideas. I’m all about embracing other viewpoints and I would NEVER claim to know it all or even be well versed on most topics. But what I do know is that, geez, give me a minute! Let my brain catch up and check in on what I know and need to know.
I remember when I had a pool. My first pool and probably my last. It was a disaster trying to keep that thing crystal clear. I went from pool place to pool place looking for the secret recipe only to get more frustrated and further from sparkling blue water. I decided to give it one more go before I bought lilypads and frogs to add to my swamp. At the last pool place, I planned on visiting, the young man who came to the counter couldn’t have been more than 18. I felt defeated but was committed to trying anything he said. SHAZAM - his recipe worked and we enjoyed the rest of the summer splashing about in clean or thoughtfully treated water. I tell you this story because I remember being overwhelmed with all the ideas and advice and ready to through in the towel. It’s easy to do when everyone has their own ideas they are ready to share with fervor.
Becoming more self-aware is critical for your journey to self-discovery. I’ve learned so much about myself and realize I’ve just dipped my toe in. Let’s learn from some experts and I’ll share some of my learning along the way and not just my tried and true pool shocking recipe!
Nick Wignall helps us with 10 Simple Ways to Improve Your Self-Awareness found on his blog
VIDEO - Start turning your DIFFERENCES into USP | Dr. Ramya Ranganathan
CHALLENGE: take some time to check in with yourself, and explore the quirks that make you, YOU. Leverage those very differences, as your unique strengths.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Jul 19, 2022
Tuesday Jul 19, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are looking to get intentional—no more flying by the seat of our pants waiting for our big break or hoping for more. We are recommitting to living a life with meaning so that we can dictate the type of legacy we leave and the impact we have on this world. Have you ever stepped back and looked at your role and the influence you’ve had? What do you think they would say if you could be a fly on the wall and visit the important and unimportant people in your life? What has been your impact? What will you be remembered for? When asked this question, most people start with “well I hope they say…”. Let’s secure that legacy by living a more meaningful life now. Let’s make a conscious effort to impact people in a positive way directly versus hoping they remember the good about you and forget the rest. You see, you have the power to effect change and it starts with you.
Many people believe there are three types of people; the thinkers, the connectors, and the doers. Some people think there are “big idea” folks and then the others who carry those ideas out. And yes, it takes everyone to make the world go round but never count yourself short of any talent or skill. You can dramatically alter the life of one person at a time with your kindness and encouragement. This is how you start a positive ripple. Think about it, you influence someone in a positive way and then they turn and do the same in their network.
I break it down so digestible because I think we have a tendency to overcomplicate terms like “finding your purpose” or “live a life with meaning”. These are what “thinkers” figure out and then tell us how to get there right? Not entirely. You need to trust in yourself as you search for meaning. Your journey is personal and unique.
Over at the Pursuit of Happiness, we learn about Viktor Frankl and Man’s Search for Meaning.
Nina Amir warns us to BE MINDFUL OF THE GAPS IN YOUR LIFE found on her blog
CHALLENGE: Fill the gaps in your life story. Be intentional about the influence you have and the mark you make. Remember, encouraging one person can have a profound effect on the world.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Jul 12, 2022
Tuesday Jul 12, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we’re breaking up with our old patterns and making room for something new as we change harmful into helpful habits! You know we all have those little things we still hold on to, justifying that one day, soon, we’ll change our ways, and do better. You name it and we’ve justified it at one time or another. These might be habits we learned at an early age or ones we’ve adopted recently to cope with a trying time in our lives. Nevertheless, they have to go. We are on a quest for a new, healthy, and sustainable life full of joy. Old and harmful habits don’t have a place in our new normal. You might be carrying something around that you didn’t even know was harmful. Maybe it’s not as tangible as overeating and drinking but more personal and internal. Either way, it’s not serving you in a positive way so guess what…it’s got to go! Grab those pruning shears and let’s get to work cutting out the dead weight that’s preventing you from thriving.
Routines are great, aren’t they? Patterns we have in our life which require little thought. Auto-pilot if you will. Sometimes they protect us from the more mundane aspects of our life. The drive you’ve made to work thousands of times, the laundry that piles up every week without fail, cashing your check and paying your bills, mowing the lawn, taking out the trash over and over. But routines can also protect bad habits that can go unaddressed for decades. The morning cigarette with coffee, the beer to unwind, the slice of pie that perks up a bad mood, the negative self-talk that keeps us from feeling confident, the gossip that makes us feel like part of a crowd.
When is the last time you examined your daily routines and rituals? When is the last time you challenged your thinking? When is the last time you adopted something new?
Let’s take a personal inventory to see where we spend our time, what feels good and provides great benefits, and what might be holding us back. Let’s be careful with the “feels good” part of this inventory. Not everything that feels good is actually good for us. Evaluate the short and long-term effects and benefits of these routines and rituals.
Gretchen Rubin - Health, Habits, and Happiness
CHALLENGE: conduct a personal inventory to identify those routines and rituals that are holding you hostage. Develop their replacement by understanding what new helpful habits you need to adopt. Break’um to Make’um!
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Jul 05, 2022
Tuesday Jul 05, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we’re going to take a step back as we attempt to look at the bigger picture, find the irony, celebrate, the unexpected benefits, and learn from the unintended consequences. Oh hindsight, you’re a beautiful thing with horrible timing. And good intentions, well you’re just that. No judgment here. Our continued quest for self-discovery is about learning from our successes and failures. So many times we can’t see the forest through all the trees. We make reactive decisions trying to solve an immediate problem only to create a bigger and more far-reaching issue. So what’s the solution? Is there a cure for this infirmity? Oh boy, that would be Nobel prize worthy since unintended consequences have been happening since the beginning of man. My intention here is to use this topic to broaden our views beyond thinking of people in power attempting to create policy that helps instead of hurts. I want us to think about our own thought processes. How many angles do we consider? How many opposing opinions or ideas? Who all and what all do we consider before making a decision?
I think we can all safely say we’ve had tunnel vision at one point or another in our lifetimes. Oh and mix in this idea that we know it all = lots of decisions without fully thinking it through. I mean, you only know what you know right? Unfortunately, you can only use that excuse for so long. At some point, you have to want to know more, about yourself, the world around you, and what your impact is and can be.
So to avoid unintended consequences, we’re going to look at this top from a number of angles; what is it, our protection bubble, good and bad, causes, reasons, and motivations, why it’s important to embrace opposing views, and how to increase our critical thinking - sound fun?
Over at the Fraiser Institue if found our jumping-off point: Unintended
Consequences - How Regulation Influences Behaviour by Christopher J. Coyne
Great Moments in Unintended Consequences - Vol 5
Great Moments in Unintended Consequences - Vol 6
Great Moments in Unintended Consequences - Vol 7
CHALLENGE: test your solution from every angle to see how others might be impacted. Embrace the positive and learn from the negative to course correct any unintended circumstances.
I Know YOU Can Do It!
Tuesday Jun 28, 2022
Tuesday Jun 28, 2022
SHOW NOTES:
On this show…we are dropping the negativity, the fear, and the anger as we adopt a kinder approach to ourselves and others. We are seeking the good, the possible, and even the impossible as we initiate a radical mood makeover. Tired of feeling frustrated, irritated, and helpless? Most of us are. Yet day after day we visit and revisit these feelings, staying stuck without a real plan forward. Unlike Cinderella, there is no Fairy Godmother standing ready to transform our lives or our attitudes with a wave of her wand. We have to dry our eyes, calm our nerves, and cool our jets to see what we’re actually working with. You can’t strive for better if you aren’t sure where you’re falling short. And wallowing in our melancholy mood is getting us nowhere. So, let’s start there. What are your mind and body telling you and where might you be missing the message?
Your body might be saying, “Hey you, I’m tired and I need a little more rest to perform at the level at which you are pushing our life’s pace.” But outside influences say - there is plenty of time to rest when you’re dead. Your mind might be saying, “Ouch, I’m getting bogged down with all this conflicting information and super anxious bu the tone!” But outside influences tell you - you HAVE to stay informed or you can’t get involved. It’s up to you to fix it!
As a result of this constant struggle, you feel behind and anxious about catching up. Wonder where your bad mood comes from? I’m not sure but it sounds like we’re on the right track. And if you don’t know, should you look for the answers? Let me remind you, no one is going to do it for you. There isn’t a happy clown to visit when you feel blue or a water boy to ice you down when you’re angry, and if there was a warm hug at ready when you’re having a bad day - I would know about it! Did I mention the journey to self-discovery is essentially a solo mission? Oh sure, you have plenty of help along the way but it takes your foot on the gas to continue forward.
So I want to know more about these moods, where they come from, and what can I do to get to the source of the irritant, overcome it, and get back on my journey. It’s hard to expect peak performance when you have sludge in your engine, right?
The Better Health Channel gives us more ideas on Monitoring your mood.
Dr. Ellen Hendriksen shares How to Stop Feeling Overly Responsible from quickanddrydirtytips.com
CHALLENGE: initiate a mood makeover today by dropping the negative and self-defeating attitude you’ve embraced and adopting the exciting world of possibilities you have at your fingertips. Left or right, you choose!
I Know YOU Can Do It!