Encouragementology

What You Seek You Shall Find

March 23, 2021

SHOW NOTES:

On this show...we are looking for the good. Intentionally trying to find the positive in everything we do because what you seek, you shall find. Where you put the majority of your attention will yield the biggest returns. Could it be that easy?  Positive or negative, you can control the yield.  So take a moment to think about your day, week, or month. What are you pursuing? Where is your focus? Are you being intentional, seeking the good, and inviting in the positive, or just getting lost in the chaos.  Collectively, we can either drown in the negatively spewing our own buckets of hate OR we can rise above and intentionally pursue the good. The good in ourselves, in the people we encounter, and in our daily interactions with the world. 

Do you know the only way to get rid of darkness is to add light? Darkness is the absence of light so to change it any other way, simply doesn’t work. Sometimes we can get so focused on the darkness in our lives, bumping around hitting wall after wall. Blaming and shaming, pursuing things we can not change. We focus on what went wrong with our lives as a justification to stay stuck where we are, chastising ourselves for poor choices and lack of knowledge. Dark. 

So much of what we obsess about is out of our control but we can’t seem to accept that or forgive ourselves. Forgiving ourselves would mean granting ourselves freedom to move on and step into the light but then what? What would happen with all that stuff? The stuff we feel responsible for, burdened by, even plagued. Shouldn’t we carry this around as evidence that we’re no good? 

 

Dani DiPirro shares how to light up your life: 5 ways to make your path brighter. She is an author, blogger, and designer living in Washington, DC. Dani launched PositivelyPresent.com in 2009 with the intention of sharing her insights about living a positive and present life (something that didn’t always come easy to her!).

Here are her thoughts...This morning I was walking down the same path I had walked down the night before and it suddenly dawned on me how different my thoughts were in the daylight. Last night, I'd been walking down the brick path late at night and I'd been slightly scared, walking fast, clutching my keys, and occasionally looking over my shoulder. But when I ventured down the same path this morning, I was walking leisurely, strolling along and not once considering looking behind me. It dawned on me that that's the difference between night and day, between darkness and light. 

The 5 Best Ways to Shed Light on Your Path

  1. Bring your own source of light.
  2. Choose your route carefully.
  3. Imagine the best possible scenario.
  4. Be prepared for the dark spots. 
  5. Life is filled with light and dark

Don’t you love when you hear golden nuggets of inspiration that take root in and you're able to apply them throughout your life in so many ways? Well, that happened to me several weeks ago and I had to share. 

I was listening to a horse trainer give his story and in it came an important revelation. He was talking about working with a new horse. Now, this wouldn’t be a typical trail horse but a horse that works a ranch. One required to be a part of the team and perform critical duties for his rider. So synergy and trust would be crucial here. The trainer talked about two ways you can get to that point. You could pull back, kick, spur, and shout, over correcting his every move until he does what you want. Or, you could be patient, ride it out until he does something just right, and then celebrate this achievement, praising him, and asking for more just like that. 

Now, with these types of nuggets, I like to climb up high for a bigger perspective and look out to see how this affects other areas of my life. Be patient, ride it out, and celebrate the good asking for more of the same. 

So many times we stay perched on the negative waiting for the other shoe to drop. We listen to negative banter, sensational headlines, and tragedy after tragedy and our perception is everything is falling apart so why bother. We are back in the darkness. But looking for the good, waiting out the storm instead of being overtaken by it, and celebrating the things going right adds in the light. A slight shift of perspective can open up a whole new world. 

Now we all know this to be fact, you can’t turn on the news without hearing the bad and feeling worse. It’s a commonly accepted practice today. But besides the immediate shift in your overall well-being, could there be long-term effects to this kind of focus?

Elena Molokotos shares her insight in an article reviewed by the Scientific Advisory Board: The Effects of Media on Memory posted on psychcentral.com.

Our access and exposure to media dramatically increased over the last decade, specifically in terms of quantity and available modalities with widespread implications for different aspects of human life. Media engagement impacts how we form relationships with strangers to how we experience life as a whole. One such impact, perhaps less commonly discussed, is the media’s effect on human memory and how this affects the way we recall history.

Catch the show for all the details on these findings…

What if we concentrated on only sharing the good? Now, don’t get me wrong, everyone needs an accountability partner or a safe and trusting inner circle i.e. support group or close friends so for this experiment I’m referring to what we speak to the world.  What if your water cooler story was about something funny or heartwarming? What if your social posts were uplifting and encouraging? What if you chose to turn the other cheek and not engage with something that rubbed you the wrong way? 

Well Dr. Holly Parker, a lecturer at Harvard University and a psychologist in private practice gives a new perspective on sharing an article for psychologytoday: The Art and Science of Celebrating the Good Times

When it comes to the jolly stuff of life, we humans love talking about it, even if it’s with just one other person. On anywhere from 60-80 percent of our days, we mention a positive moment to someone else. Just think about a time when something really cool happened, you got wonderful news, or you simply experienced a pleasant point in your day.

Capitalization allows us to relish the feelings that arise from a wonderful, significant turn of events or simply an amusing moment.

  1. Start small.
  2. Give what you'd want to get. 
  3. Take an active-constructive approach. 

I love sharing the good and for me, with anything, I need to make time to be intentional. I need structure in my day to work on all the things I want and need to do. From exploring and reading, to learning new things, and connecting with others. Life can get away from you and before you know it, instead of paddling against the current you are simply floating along picking up all the debris as you go. Everyone wants your attention and not necessarily to influence you with positive things that will help your growth. Start to take notice of your day and where your attention lies. Break up your day because some of us tend to be more conscious in the morning where others are more alert at night. 

 

CHALLENGE: if needed, shift your focus from ruminating about the past, being frustrated by things outside of your control, or partaking in the negative narratives of the world. Instead open yourself to receive the light of goodness, gratitude, and joy knowing what you seek you shall find.

 

I Know YOU Can Do It!

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